Singlemum

Love yourself ❤

Posted on by BusyMum

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It’s hard to love yourself.

To love the things you want to change.

To love yourself on good days and bad days.

To trust in your ability to be who you really are and not mould to someone else’s idea.

I’m realising more and more that it’s ok to say “Yeah, i’m good at that”. Confidence and Arrogance are completely different. Yes, I know what i’m good at but I also know that there are plenty better than me….and I love them 😍

For me, singing is my talent and one i’m so grateful to have but I haven’t used it to it’s full potential. I’ve let it become lost in my anxieties.

When I get asked, “So you can sing?” I’ve never known how to respond incase i’m asked to sing something then and there and they don’t like it. 🙈

It’s ludicrous and irrational but the truth.

When I started posting videos of myself singing, it would be fine until i’d picture the folk rolling their eyes and thinking “she loves herself”. For all the genuine praise, I would let one negative thought spoil it.

Something weird has happened though, just in this past wee while.

I do love myself.

I know where my strengths and weaknesses are. I know I can make people happy. I know i’m not perfect.

I know i’m not everyones cup of tea and that’s completely fine.

I’ve always settled for what I thought I deserved, not what I wanted and  always tried to play it safe.

Always thought that unless i’m skinnier, prettier that I don’t deserve the best. My voice isn’t going to change whether i’m a size 8 or 20!. I may never been a size 12. If I am, great! However i’m not going to look back on my life in 50 years time and have regrets. I know what I want out of life but I have to love myself first before anyone else can.

So take note.

Know what you’re good at and for goodness sake, do it! You are completely and utterly worth it and life is just too short. Love yourself and it will radiate.

My name is Eileen.

I have a Talent.

That’s ok.

Watch this space 🙂

 

Much Love. Xxx

 

 

 

 

 

Friends: Always and Forever

Posted on by BusyMum

20190701_221159.jpgA true friend is a soul mate. Male or female, they are a person who accepts you for all your flaws, supports you through everything whether they agree with you or not, and even if months pass by will be there for you when you need it. Friends are the family we get to choose.

I have an amazing, close knit family whom i’m so grateful for but jeezy peeps would I have fallen into the darkness even further had it not been for my pals. My chums. My soul mates.

They saw it. They saw the unhappiness in me. The loneliness. They saw the anxiety and never once gave me a hard time for it. I missed get togethers, nights out, weddings. I allowed myself to become so absorbed in my own unhappiness, that I missed out on important things because I couldn’t face leaving the house. They stood by me.

They supported me through all the challenges i’ve had from my depression to my separation. They still do.

It’s easy to let our lives get busy and i’m the worlds worst for trying to commit to a date for a blether and a cuppy. (I’M GETTING BETTER…TRULY!) I forget birthdays until the last minute. I forget things that are important in your lives, but I do love you all and you know I would do anything for any one of you. You all know who you are. ❤

I didn’t know how I would feel living alone again. Completely alone. The thing is though, I’ve never felt alone. You have all been there, whether it’s a snapchat everyday, a text, a phonecall…you have all been there, even when I haven’t been for you.

We are over half way through the year and I still have so many people to see that i’ve missed out on time with. A couple of folk I haven’t seen in over two years. I’m going to change that. You are going to be a priority in my life because without you all (and as cheesey as it sounds), I wouldn’t be who I am and wouldn’t have gotten this far without you.

Thank you, soul mates. For encouraging me to be the best me. For sitting with me through the moans, the tears, the anger. For never judging me. For waiting for me to find myself again.

I’ll not let you down.

Much love xx